JB-  Right.  Now are the censors pretty sticky about things though?

BV-  Well now, thanks to Janet Jackson (at the Super Bowl) the entire show is on a five-second delay.  It used to be that they would have the censor, Mrs. Futterman, who would sit with what we called the "Futter button" and if she felt something was going to go awry she would just push the button and make it a delay.  That had cost a lot of money so they just decided to bite the bullet and put the whole thing on a delay.  Not that it's really come into play.  I mean, people remember where they are most of the time - 99 per cent of the time - so they don't say anything wildly inappropriate.  This year, for example, the rap song, "It's Hard Out Here for a Pimp", there was many negotiations about which words could be said and which words couldn't be said.

JB-  One of the shows that you're on now is "Celebrity Fit Club" on VH1.  So at the beginning of that you weighed…

BV- Beginning of "Fit Club" I weighed 315 (pounds).

JB-  And your target was 270.

BV-  I think so, yeah.

JB-  How did you do?

BV- I didn't get anywhere near that.  The target was unreasonable.  That was their target, it wasn't my target.  They wanted me to lose 45 pounds and that wasn't going to happen - not for the diet they gave us.

JB-  What did you have to change in your life?

BV-  To stick on the diet they gave us - the first few weeks were all fruits and vegetables and the weight poured off of you.  And then you started introducing food, like if you could catch a three ounce chicken, you could eat it.

JB-  Can you do that?

BV-  You should have seen me!

JB-  (laughing)

BV-  Chasing them with a Ziploc bag, "Come here you three ounce chicken.  Wait, I'm going to look for a four ounce tuna here."  The idea was you introduced small amounts of regular food into your diet but at the same time you're doing (intense) exercise.  Unless you're already in fair shape to begin with you can't do this kind of workout on the kind of energy that you're inhaling.  You just haven't got the strength.  It doesn't work.  Everybody went on their own diet.  I went on the Zone diet.  I just ordered Zone food.  (laughing)  Just ate what came.  And that was hard.  I was sticking to just the stuff that was there.  But I did lose the weight and I was able to do the kind of workout I could do.  I can't do the kind of workout somebody 28-years-old can do.  So I was doing aqua aerobics and the elliptical and stuff that I could handle.  But I wasn't going to take off no 45 pounds in 100 days.  I took of 21 or 22 pounds and that was just fine by me and by everybody.

JB-  It's better than not having done it.

BV-  Yeah.

JB- So why did you go on the show?

BV-  They paid me.  They paid me a tremendous amount of money and no one had ever paid me to lose weight before.  And I thought, "I can make a living losing weight?!?!"  I had also just finished doing two years of "Hairspray" the musical on tour and on Broadway.  I lost some weight doing that and I knew that I was doing to become a couch potato.  And this thing came just as I was wrapping up Hairspray and I thought this is like God saying, "Continue losing weight."  I want to do more stage work and if you're going to do that it's better to be in good shape.

JB-  Did you learn anything about yourself in that?

BV-  I learned that I could do more than I thought I could do.  I had really said "I'm just too old a fart to really do any of this stuff" and discovered I could actually climb a 25 foot rope ladder.  I didn't realize I could do that.

JB- Does it make you feel like more of a kid again?

BV- No.  It just makes you feel like more of a human being.  It got me out of my self image as Jabba the Hutt.

JB-  (laughing)  Aww… is that really how you felt?  Is image really important to you?

BV- Well, you know, I've been a sight gag for so many years that I suppose it doesn't really matter.  I guess it was a choice I made years ago when I realized I was never going to look like Brad Pitt.  I just decided, "Why bother?"  It hasn't really bothered me or gotten in my way.  As I've gotten better known, which happened to me later in life, now people are pointing and laughing because they've seen me on television.  And it's very funny to watch the difference.  It's like, "Who is this odd looking person coming towards me?" as opposed to "Oh that guy!"

JB-  For so many years you were always behind the camera - you were never really seen on TV - so why did you make the change?  Was it Hollywood Squares?

BV- I said yes, "Yeah I'll be on camera".  I'd always been an actor, I'd always been performing, but I'd just been on the back burner and I was writing a lot.  And with Hollywood Squares I suddenly became a public personality.  When you're on TV every night they just throw lots of offers at you.  And you're a fool to say no because who knows when this money will come that way again?  And it was kind of fun.  I was old enough to realize what it was like to not be demoralized by it.  You know, when it happens to you when you're very young you're not equipped to handle it and you can go nuts.  But I've seen it from the other side - I've seen it as a journalist and I've seen it as an entourage member.  So I was now on the third side of the triangle and it was fascinating… and remains fascinating.

JB-  Which do you prefer more?  Do you like being behind the camera or in front of it, or on stage.

BV- Oh I think being in front of the camera is more fun.  It's more gratifying.  I mean, I enjoy the writing, I enjoy everything I always did enjoy but when asked that question I have to say it's more fun to carry on.  It's more fun to perform than it is to sit in your room and face the keyboard.

JB-  Is it true that the script for the show is constantly changing as the show is happening?

BV- Yeah.  It's a live event  -- maybe the biggest live event.  The host is the host of the party.  And even though you know it's scripted you want it to have a spontaneous feel.  You want to be able to think that the host is there with the rest of the people and commenting on what's happening as it goes along.  After all, that's why he's the host.  But because it's on television and there's a lot of pressure, there are people backstage like me who are helping, who are advising, consulting, throwing jokes at him and helping him come up with whatever he's going to do on stage.  And of course, occasionally the guy just goes out there and says something himself because these people are all clever.  That's how they got where they are.